The manager Dave Butler is getting steamed up about match balls going missing due to our off target shooting, so to solve this dilemma Dave has decided to purchase new balls from the M.O.D.
Each ball will contain:
1 Laser guided goal search programming
2 Outer titanium anti-header coating
3 Sarin gas rather than hand pumped air
4 Anthrax dispersion when opposition kick off
5 A big red cross so we know what to hit