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Will's Diary

Hi & welcome to what I hope will be a regular feature on this site.

I think I had a pretty good season with the bat this year but the thing that pleases me most is that I am now 5 foot 3 inches tall which represents 1/2 inch growth during the season, although I still have to look up to Graham Whitehouse I hope this will not be for long.

What a great night friday was, thanks to Rocker for organising the 'do'(Jase did a little bit but not much, suppose its much like his season but at least he didnt sulk when taken off). I myself won the under 17s batting & second team 'Captains Prize' and felt that id grown a whole inch durin the night, however this wasn't so, as i still had to look up to Bob Howarth who is 5ft 3 & 1/2 inch tall).

Great news Ive this morning been appointed captain of the Yorkshire team in the Cricinfo County Championship, Dwarfs Section. Alongside me in the side are Bob Johnson, Graham Whitehouse & Bob Howarth. This is particularly great news as Im hoping to be selected in the one day team to face Lilliput next year as long as i dont grow anymore.

Life cant get better than this, ive been selected in the 'A' team for the 8 a side tournament against the leprechauns, pygmies, & lilliputians. There are seven of my mates also in the team but who's that bird Snow White, who they have appointed skipper? Ive heard shes fookin dopey but Graham Whitehouse aint in the team!!!!!

Ever since this column began it has been the catalyst for good fortune to be bestowed on me, ive learned today that i am to be chief elf on santa's christmas tour, with a special responsibilty for looking after the mousses, Im taking advice from Barney Sykes as he has past experience on dealing with mousses for a short time period only, so Simon 'The Mincer' Walker told me anyway.
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